Papa

On Tuesday, Mr. C's grandfather, aka Papa, passed away. He had been in poor health for a long time, and was undergoing radiation on his neck that made it very difficult for him to eat or speak. While we're both very sad, we're happy to know that he is no longer in pain.

Over Easter, the entirety of Mr. C's family was able to get together at Nana & Papa's house. Mr. C's Cousin Baseball, was throwing a surprise 60th birthday for Uncle Baseball in Ohio, where Cousin Baseball lives and works. That meant that Uncle Baseball, who lives in South Carolina, was able to reschedule the last half of his trip when we realized that Papa was really not doing well. We'd been planning on heading to Mr. C's parent's for Easter, but easily switched gears. It was really lovely getting to spend the entire weekend with Mr. C's extended family. We had our own mini Easter service in the living room, where one of Mr. C's younger cousins gave a sermon, and we all ate way too much ham.

I feel so lucky to have gotten to spend the time with Papa that I did. I don't have any grandparents left, so have really appreciated how lucky I was to come into a family with two. Papa & Nana embraced me with open arms, and made me feel like I was just another one of the grandkids, in the best way. I will always remember trying to sneak the good flavors of jelly beans out of the jar on Easter Sunday, and Papa waggling his finger at me with a smile. He loved his family, was devoted to his community, and will be sorely missed by us all.

Papa with his grandpuppy Bear in early April

Dressing Our Moms

My mom and Mr. C's mom are a study in opposites. Dr. Mom, mine, is a veterinarian who owns her own practice, doesn't take crap from anybody, and is more comfortable in an Iowa State sweatshirt and blue jeans than anything else. Her illustrative example is that when she was 7 months pregnant with me, she was testing for the next belt up in Tai Kwon Do. They wouldn't let her do flying sidekicks because of the pregnancy, and she was pissed. That, in one story, is my mom.

At a friends' wedding a few years ago. Silly faces, but typical wedding wear.

Mamma C, on the other hand, is a fashion conscious kindergarten teacher. I love her dearly, but she is so different from my own mom. Whereas my mother is taller than my 5' 7" by a solid inch and a half, Mamma C fits under my chin. As a result, she lives in high heels. Her illustrative example is that when we moved Sister C into her new apartment, carrying furniture and boxes, Mamma C was right there with us in leopard print stilettos.

Mr. C's family at a wedding last fall. Not pictures, Mamma C's stiletto shoes

So, when it came to choosing dresses for each lady, it was not an easy task. Mamma C needed something keeping with her usual style, while my mom is a one-dress-a-year type of girl, and anything too over the top would make everyone who knows her go "who the heck is that?" So, we set out looking for dresses that would make them both feel happy, comfortable, and like themselves.

For Mamma C, we were looking at sparkles. When both of our families were here with us, we went to the shop where I had bought my gown. Both mom's went through the racks. My mom didn't hit on anything that was perfect, but Mamma C picked out a few options. Finally, we settled on this stunner:

Style 114900 for Montage by Mon Cherie 

This was actually one of the more subdued dressed that Mamma C tried on. We were trying to find something that was still perfect for her, without being too unbalanced from the type of (read: simpler) dresses my mom was looking at. We went ahead and ordered this, with the caveat that we'll shorten it to a pencil skirt. It is going to look awesome. I haven't yet gotten to see Mamma C in it, but here's a photo of the dress:

Sneak peak of Sister C's dress!

My mom actually ended up finding her dress without me. We'd gone back and forth for awhile, and in fact when she and my dad came out to visit, she brought a couple of options with her. Unfortunately none of those worked, so the search continued. Now, Brother E broke up with his girlfriend last month, but she had been very close with my family. So much so that my mom took her along when looking for dresses. And boy, did they find a beauty.

Dress 72259 by C20 for Watters

Seriously, this is the perfect dress for my mom. Comfortable to move in, a good length, glamorous without being flashy. I was super excited that we had the chance to go try it on when I was home last month, so I could see it in person. It is so pretty! Then, of course, the next question has to be about jewelry and shoes. Because Mamma C's dress is so sparkly, I wanted my mom to have a fun necklace to balance it out. And boy, we managed it.

Bling!

See???? So pretty and sparkly. And matching earrings. And we found her some shoes that she'll be comfortable (and taller than me, always and still) in.

So that's the story of what our mom's our wearing. We still need to finalize the details for Mamma C, but next time they're in town we'll get to go try on her dress and see what she wants to pair with it. I can't wait!

November: A Month of Challenges

So I've been planning awhile (and talked in this post) about participating in NaNoWriMo this month. I'm three days in and only at 2,160 words, but my parents and Mr. C's parents have been here, so there hasn't been much time for writing. The good news is, when I do sit down, I'm able to churn out quite a bit of content pretty quickly. So far, we're flowing pretty well.

Mom & Dad P seeing the sites

This November I've also decided to try "No Spend November." I have a bad habit of letting little purchases sneak up on me; Target and CVS are the worst. I'm in no way in trouble financially, but I think taking the month to see what I really need will help. Basically, I'm cutting out all of my impulse buys and reexamining what it is that I really need. Hopefully this will help the holidays hurt a little less. Yesterday morning I went out and got the things I know I'll have to restock anyway; shampoo, conditioner, and toothpaste. Toiletry and makeup wise, which is an area I tend to splurge a bit, I should be all set. Here's a list of what I'm going to avoid and how I'm going to try to mitigate the purchase:

• Clothing - I refreshed a couple of months ago, and right now my wardrobe is in a good place. I could use another pair of khaki's, but those can wait until December. 
• Household goodies - Ugh, this is a tough one. I love buying new candles and little things to set around. If there's something I really can't live without, I'll see if it is something I can DIY. 
• Gifts - This is another hard one. I love buying little things for Mr. C, plus the holidays are fast approaching. I already have a couple of gifts for certain individuals, and hopefully can look at things to make for those who are left. Plus, no more little bottles of Coke Zero for Mr. C magically appearing in the apartment. 
• Toiletries/makeup - Like I said, I should be set here, and actually have a return to make to CVS. 
• Dinner - This is probably the easiest trap to fall in. Luckily, with our folks being here, we've got TONS of leftovers from the dinners out we've had, and they've been buying. So we'll live on those for a few more days, then I'll get back into cooking again. I also need to be better about getting supplies for lunches, instead of depending on leftovers that don't always happen. 

So, that's the plan. I know I have some expenses that I can't avoid; student loan payments, co-pays for PT and my dermatologist visit next week, gas, things like that, but I'm going to try to manage everything else as best as I can. I'll try to remember to touch base and fill you in on how it goes!

My boys

There are moments every now and then where I sort of pull up short and just feel so astoundingly blessed. A few weeks ago, it was running to Kmart to buy Mr. C a bottle of shampoo. I know that sounds like the silliest thing, really I do. But I have a man who loves me, who cares for me, and who I love and care for. And sometimes that means I buy him shampoo. And that sounds strange, but it just sort of caught me as being wonderful.

This morning I had another one of those moments. While Mr. C works a regular Monday-Friday work week, I actually work Tuesday-Saturday. Most days, Mr. C's alarm goes off at 6:30, and he feeds The Moose.

The Moose says hi

Ala Pavlov, The Moose knows that when Mr. C's alarm goes off, it is time for breakfast. This morning, I woke up a little early. I sprained my ankle pretty badly, and it was aching pretty badly this morning and woke me up before my alarm. I stayed in bed for awhile, checking email and trying to find the perfect wedding necklace. The Moose hopped up on the bed, climbed right over me, and laid down on Mr. C's chest. Mr. C was still asleep, but sort of groggily came to, reached up, and started petting The Moose. Then the cat would jump down, trying to get Mr. C to follow him, realize he wasn't, and hop back up on the bed to start it all over again.

After three rounds of this, I managed to snag a picture. Mr. C might kill me for posting this, but it just makes my heart swell. Right after I took this photo, The Moose actually leaned down and sort of bumped Mr. C in the head, trying to get him to wake up, and Mr. C reached back up to pet him again. These are my boys. They are my whole life, and I love them so much that it almost aches. Mr. C has never had a cat before, and seeing how much he cares about The Moose makes me so happy.

I hear people ask sometimes why you should eve bother to get married, especially for people in our situation. We already live together, so what's the point? The point is, that as much as we love each other, after we sign our names on that paper we are officially a family. We are a team, emotionally, spiritually, and legally. In all senses of the world he is mine, and I am his, and we have the start of a very happy family together.

Waffling, or It Is All About Two Families Coming Together

A few posts ago, I weighed the pros and cons of the various locations we were considering for our location. As you may recall, Mr. C is from Connecticut, I'm from Iowa, and we live in New York. We did a lot of thinking and decided that, logistically, we were really leaning towards having the wedding in New York. We even went and looked at a really great venue that we were very very happy with. Both of us walked away imagining our wedding day there. Here's a photo of the site. Lovely, right?

via Matt Ramos Photography

The night after our venue visit, I called my parents and let them know that we'd found a place that we really liked. I'll preface this by telling you that my parents are awesome. They are exceptionally supportive, have always been there for me eve during some really tough times, and are some of the most practical minded people you'll ever meet. That's why it was such a shock that they were so upset when I told them we were looking to get married in New York. Mr. C and I had both assumed that once we laid out the practicalities of it, they'd understand and be right there with us. 

Now, they both said that no matter what, they'd be wherever we were with bells on. But, I could tell they were really unhappy. It took about a week for us to connect again, and to be honest I was over everything wedding. I cried more times than I can count, had my awesome maid of honor bring me some chocolate milk, and was generally just miserable. Finally, I got my parents sat down over Google Chat, and we were able to talk everything out. Their big suggestion was to do two separate days, one in Iowa, one in New York. Two days, two groups, hopefully with some people able to travel but really one of my family and one of his. 

Mr. C and I sat down and had a big heart-to-heart about this. I was pretty distraught, trying to figure out how we were going to work two parties into our budget, and how we would be able to make everyone happy. And then, Mr. C, in his brilliance, said the exactly right thing. "Isn't this whole process about our two families coming together, to celebrate our new family? And if we have one day with your family, and one with mine, that is kind of contrary to the point." 

So, we completely scrapped the idea of two weddings. I called my parents, and told them we were going to get married in Iowa. Mr. C's family, bless them, are totally okay with it. We'll try to do a special dinner with his grandparents and anyone else who can't make it, and try to set up some sort of live video feed for the ceremony so they can watch. We actually went over to see his parents and sister this weekend, and they really reassured me. I can't tell you how lucky I am to have this awesome family that I get to be a part of. They are really supportive, and now we can start moving forward with the actual planning of this thing!